Truthfully, I Don’t Know What I’m Doing (DoL #1)
I wanted to add a quote to make this post look all aesthetic, but it didn`t really work cause I don`t know any good philosophical quotes
1 am, i’m sat at my computer screen and only now do i realise what i’ve gotten myself into taking this course. I signed up for philosophy last year a naive grade 11, with big dreams and eager to start his grade 12 year taking super interesting courses like Philosophy, Comparative Civilisations, courses that would allow me to learn something, other than math and science, which truthfully, i don’t really care about. Easy courses were the goal for grade 12, I figured what’s the point in taking something like pre-calc if i’m destined to fail? What university, college, post secondary program would look at at my application and think, well atleast he tried it out, no, i needed some good marks, some “easy” marks, these past few hours, messily jotting down my cluttered thoughts, like verbal vomit all over the paper, leaving the it wrinkled, coffee stained, and smudged, frantically pacing back and forth in my room, texting all of my friends for some sort of insight on what it is that we’re supposed to be doing, have proven that these wont be easy marks.
Dont get me wrong more went into my choosing philosophy than easy marks, and the fact that I needed another elective, I also have just always thought that Philosophy was a fascinating subject. Going into philosophy I was actually really excited! I was never really interested in numbers and science, although to be fair, i suppose philosophy is a social science; but rather, i was interested in the way the world works: why do we think the way we do? Where do our thoughts come from? How is the world around us affecting our personal being, and our external being, how we interact with others? I’ve had many a long conversation into the wee hours of the night, following rabbit trails, starting at something simple such as, “why does a guy have to wear his watch on his left hand?” And ending at “how does our brain perceive the world and what is language?” Or something equally as bizarre and abstract, questions that only come about when you’re so tired that nothing you say makes sense but at the same time makes so much sense. I live for these conversations, that only make sense to those who are involved and you get lost in your thoughts and forget where you were in the first place. never liked numbers, or science, I’ve always preferred discussion rather than dissecting, sharing ideas rather than answers. I came into philosophy hoping i’d learn more about the world around me and I wasn’t disappointed.
The first project we were given was an essay, that honestly was my first look into the world of philosophy, prior to this i literally knew next to nothing about the subject, like a window, a whole world opened up and inside i saw a new realm of people who thought differently, who never stopped looking for answers, and although i expected reading about a bunch of dead old men wouldn’t be anything extraordinary, surprisingly it was, I found it fascinating, how philosophical ideas came from discussion and community, and the lives of these philosophers, how hated they were, and how alot of them were either put to death or exiled for speaking against the “old ways.” Philosophers really had a way of loving wisdom, I personally see loving wisdom as never settling with an answer, these philosophers, the reasons that they’re such great minds to this day, is because they never stopped seeking answers, they never settled, they always asked questions, they would join together with other philosophers and converse, bounce ideas off one another, and debate till they got to what they thought was right.
In this course, with it’s many ups and downs, I hope that when i come out of this semester I can hopefully get to the point where i’m comfortable with debating, and conversing, and just being a proactive philosopher, trying to figure out a means to answer some of life’s unanswered questions, most of which i already stated above, I believe that with philosophy by my side, truly I can broaden my horizons when it comes to learning and becoming a more well rounded person, now I dont see life the way I once did, but rather with a philosophical lense.